Photos by Jules Gibson
This week we asked the man and woman in the street their views about domestic violence, what they think is the biggest factor and what should be done. Their comments follow:
Mohamed Zafar, lawyer – ‘I think that the major contributing factor to domestic violence has to do with a lack of understanding among people as it relates to reasoning in a civilised manner. The issue of domestic violence is now a chronic one in our society and unless persons are willing to use dialogue as an alternative to violence, the issue will persist. Too many times persons react in ignorant and violent ways thus resulting in deadly endings of either partners and in some cases as we have seen, children as well. The tool of education has to be seen as the answer to this ever growing problem. The masses must be taught proper anger management strategies through the process of education.’
Christine Jeremiah, private sector employee – ‘I am of the view that poverty is the major contributing factor of domestic violence. Though in some instances men are abused, it is a fact that women are the ones who make up a larger volume of victims of domestic violence. A lack of financial self sufficiency on the part of a woman causes her to remain in abusive relationships, this in some cases causes the man to feel over empowered and in control. Since he knows that the woman is dependent on him he takes advantage of the situation and ultimately advantage of her. To combat this growing problem, I firmly believe that more women should have job opportunities and seek to qualify themselves so that they would have a strong sense of bargaining power.’
Carlyle Goring, court marshal – ‘Domestic violence is the result of a number of different factors. At the top of the list is the fact that men have not attained the realisation that society has evolved or that they refuse to accept that fact. Women are now more active in the public arena as they fight vigorously for equal rights and this ultimately causes some amount of insecurity on the part of the man. Gone are the days when women just stayed at home and executed work in the traditional roles. Men have to realise that society has evolved and give women a chance to achieve. I think that the time has come for men to be educated on the issue and see women not as a threat, but as a social partner for development.’
Sherwin Benjamin, private sector employee – ‘I am of the belief that lack of education on the part of both partners is the major contributing factor to the issue of domestic violence. Both men and women need to be educated for the simple fact that both men and women are victims of the problem. It is true that a woman faces it to a greater degree. Consideration must also be given to the children born into such unions. Men are emotional creatures and tend to react in different ways, sometimes violent, but this must never be seen as better that sitting and talking in order to work out differences. I think that more counselling sessions should be made available to both men and women and they must be willing to use the services and options available to them in order to seek help and help stop or control domestic violence. Welfare officers should also make periodic checks at homes in order to evaluate how families are coping; all this may help solve the problem. Men feel economically empowered more than women and sometimes take advantage of the situation, this should not be.’
Amanda Yusuf, public sector employee – ‘The simple factor of people’s attitudes leads to the issue of domestic violence. People are no longer willing to sit down and work out their differences, they are no longer willing to talk and act in a friendly manner. It’s like they have lost their respect for each other. I think that with counselling, both males and females would be able to put a stop to the problem of domestic violence.’
Dexter Grant, private sector employee – ‘I think that one of the main reasons why we have so many domestic violence cases today is due to the fact that the police fail to act promptly on initial reports made by the victims of violence. When men realise that the police are not taking a woman’s report seriously, it then gives them an empowered feeling as if they can keep hitting the woman again and again. These men no longer exercise respect for the women or fear for the law. Too often a string of reported matters is just sitting on desks of police stations without action being taken. Women need to follow up on their reports. But the police are not always the ones to be blamed. Many times matters go before the courts and the women are the ones who beg for the man to be given another chance, saying that it is the same man who minds their children. These women need to understand that that other chance may be one which allows the man to kill them. So I think that for the problem of domestic violence to be stopped, initial reports need to be taken seriously by the police and women have to be able to know how and when to draw the line.’
Sarah Paul, legal clerk – ‘I think that the time has come when both men and women should respect themselves. Women in particular should not settle for less or decide to take nonsense from any one. The time has come when the topic should be spoken about openly. Women need to realise that they were made by God and that they have a duty to conduct themselves in a respectable manner. As they fight for equal rights, women must be able to elevate themselves academically so that they do not become dependent or like a liability upon any man. If a man says he’s leaving a woman should be able to say, I’ll show you to the door. We know that not all men are bad, and that they have a role to play in our lives and society, but it must not be at the cost of our lives as women.’
Sandra, public sector employee – ‘We have forgotten about the good old time training and the way of being brought up. We have also forgotten about God and that is why we are faced with all these problems in society today of which domestic violence is one. We have decided to adopt the American style of living and neglect to bring up our children in the right path. There is way too much envy and a breakdown in the system of discipline. Better wages and salaries are needed so that people would be better able to provide for themselves and would not have to subject themselves to abuse and abusive relationships because of the lack of finances.’
Yonette Alkins, private sector employee – ‘I think that the times in which we live have a lot to do with the growing problem of domestic violence in our society. Both men and women are victims of abuse but the fact that so many women die every day at the hands of abusive males, gives me much reason to focus on them. It is really heart rending to open the paper every day and learn that yet another woman has lost her life. No longer are women engaged in examining a man’s background before taking him into her life. In the good old days, men had to write home and ask for a woman but today, they just meeting each other on the road, and in some cases it’s just about making a dollar. Some of our women have resorted to settling for less and selling themselves short. Women need also to seek God and wait until he provides a God-fearing person for them, one who is opposed to violence.’
Donald Trotman, retired judge – ‘There are many factors responsible for the issue of domestic violence in our society today. If I can put it all in a nutshell or sum it up however, I would have to say that economic insecurity triggers off emotional insecurity and ultimately leads to an explosion of anger which results in violence on the part of both men and women. The lack of the ability of the man to proper cater for the financial needs of his household also leads to domestic violence. Another of the prominent cause of this now chronic issue has to do with interference from the extended family into the affairs of the nuclear household and there are also interferences from other mischievous external forces; those that we may want to class as news carriers. News carried without any proper verification. These are all issues that can escalate over a period of time and one day cause an explosion which may be violent on the part of either man or woman. Persons have got to be able to arrive at amicable decisions and reason in civilised ways. Solving the problem has got to start at the individual level.’
