Dear Editor,
The frequency of suicide in Guyana, and mainly among the fairly young, is as frightening as it is painful. What a waste of lives and what a burden on survivors!
I do not think that interventions are lacking from agencies, whether they be churches, probation offices, government ministries, etc. I am of the view that the environment at home provides the basis for denial that a member of the household is suicidal.
It is in the home that most, if not all, traits of members of the household are played out. But household members are either embarrassed or unwilling to consult with family members, friends or agencies. To do so would advertise a weakness within the family.
I am old enough to have heard of several utterances of “it is better I kill myself” by older folks in my area, particularly housewives, who had to ‘feed’ large families with their husbands behaving as if bringing in part of their weekly pay-packet puts an end to their familial responsibility. But those same housewives also ask of themselves the follow-up question: What will happen to my children?
That pause in their frequent temptations strengthens them to work and hope for better days, better days when their children will grow up and things will be easier. Our parents and fore-parents were tough people; they toughed it out. And they also were clued in to the behaviour of the members of the household, notwithstanding the travails of their ‘existence’. There was a togetherness, not only within the family, but also within the community. The suicide ratio could not have been what it is today.
There was another element: Parents ensured that their children, particularly their sons, go to the church or the mandir or the masjid on Sunday mornings. The place of worship was an essential part of ‘existence’. It provided spiritual/religious grounding.
Today is a far cry from those days. We no longer ‘exist’; we ‘live’. We have far more ‘trappings’ than our parents. But very few parents have a clue of what is happening under their noses. And if a neighbour dares to tell a parent what they would have noticed about his/her child, that would be the crime of the years. Very few parents will take such a hint as genuine concern for the defaulting youngster.
I have had several unpleasant retorts when I would have told some parents in my community that their sons were “smoking”. The denial syndrome is ever so noticeable ‒ until the youngster is in the hands of the police. I have parents telling me that their children are too tired from school and lessons to go to mandir on Sunday mornings. That they need their sleep.
I have meandered because I needed to relate two perspectives: Tough times, but assuaged by community togetherness and respect for the place of worship versus relative affluence adulterated by individualism and indifference for the place of worship. In essence, somewhere between the home, the community and the church (and place of work) suicidal tendencies are detectable. But there has to be some form of accommodation and willingness to consider these signals. And also some form of belief base, whether the family, the church or workplace, which can provide that mirror for our people, young and old, to be encouraged to evaluate their lives and to value life.
In my book, the home and the place of worship take precedence.
Yours faithfully,
Taajnauth Jadunauth
