We have to start educating our men to respect women

Dear Editor,
The assault against women in Guyana is escalating.  A 16-year old raped and threatened with death takes her own life. Her alleged attacker gets bail.  Why on earth is rape a bailable offence?  And to crown matters, the victim is not alive to give testimony, she is dead.

Daily there are reports on violence against women in Guyana. Women are killed, maimed and emotionally battered on a daily basis. Society watches on, helplessly. When will society collectively wake up to stop these barbaric acts?

When are we going to teach our sons that it is the most cowardly act to lift their hands against a woman, be it a wife, sister, aunt, daughter or friend? When will sons be taught that differences cannot be resolved through acts of physical, emotional or psychological violence? When will we teach our children, both boys and girl, that they are all equal, with equal potential and abilities but the one who works hardest will move ahead faster? When would in-laws start to stand up for the rights of their daughters-in-law the same way they would for their daughters? When will our neighbour’s children become our own, to cherish and love and not abuse? When will men see the spirit of their mothers in the image of every woman they meet?

We have failed our sons. We have brought up sons to believe it is no big deal to hit or chop a woman. We have brought up sons to think it is manly to suppress women, be it physically or psychologically. We have brought up our men to believe that they are superior to women. In so doing, we have not just failed our men, we have failed our societies. Our sons are tomorrow’s husbands, fathers, grandfathers.

When they are not taught to show respect to their sisters or female neighbours, how will they show respect to their wives and daughters?
Misapplication of spiritual teachings has also played a part.

We have to go back to basics. We have to start in the homes, in the schools, churches, temples and mosques. We have to start educating our men to respect women. We have to inculcate shared human values into our society. To take a quote from His Holiness, Sri Sri Ravi Shankar “we have to bring in the values of non-violence, love, caring for each other, an attitude of service, respect for each other. These values have been a part of us for ages. Only in recent years they are eroding. We have to re -establish them”.

We need to work in communities to inculcate these values. We need to shift from the culture where violence is acceptable to one where we will see Allah, Jesus and Krishna in the faces of every man, woman or child. We need all of the religious organisations to take this issue up and to deal with it effectively. We have to start now. We have to get the men to stop their violence against women and children, including little boys.

In the interim, we have to find measures to help women deal with acts of aggression against them. The government should look to put the Lottery Funds to good use. It should make this into a fund that will go to abused women to help them acquire skills to make them independent so they do not have to stay in abusive relationships. Each community needs pastoral support for abused women.

The police force also needs to treat domestic violence and acts of aggression against women with sensitivity and the required urgency and care. How can a woman sit in front of a male police officer and give an account of the abuse she has experienced at her partner’s hand?
We need to take a collective approach to dealing with this situation.

It is a situation like this that I expect to see the Hindu organisations in Guyana rising against and using their resources to change. The same goes for all other religious organisations.
Yours faithfully,
Gitanjali Singh