Caribbean American Domestic Violence Awareness (CADVA) held its first youth conference in Guyana, with the aim of stamping out all forms of violence against youths and breaking the tradition of them carrying on what they see.
The conference was held on Monday under the theme “Redefining lessons our parents thought us” and was dedicated to 16-year-old Neesa Gopaul who was murdered after suffering domestic abuse.
Neesa’s mother, Bibi Sharima-Gopaul and partner Jarvis Small, the couple charged with the teen’s murder, were recently committed to stand trial after a preliminary inquiry found that a prima facie case had been made out against them.
The conference saw youths from all ages and across the country participating and some shared personal experiences relating to the theme, while others performed cultural items.
The conference sought to explain and create awareness of the impact violence, at an early age, can have on youths and also to educate the younger generation.
About 500 youths left the conference informed and educated, according to the organizers.
The option of saying no to violence and being the change they want to see in their lives were reiterated by all the presenters.
CADVA’s Founder, Sukree Boodram used her personal experiences, as a victim of domestic violence for over two decades, to relate to those present. During her presentation she began crying as she related how she suffered at the hands of her husband for over two decades she was with him.
Boodram said that CADVA came about after she became a survivor and wanted to help Guyana and the Caribbean. “CADVA is an action organization because we have heard a lot of theories and experienced it but now is time to take action,” she said.
She related that it is their agenda to inform people, especially women who suffered at the hands of their intimate partners on a daily basis, that they have a choice to stand out and speak out and break the silence.
“Three months into my marriage I was hit and I had a `buss’ head and when I went to my mother and was told that because I grew up in a Hindu environment no other man will marry me because I slept with my husband so I went back knowingly into the hands of an abuser for over two decades but I broke that Hindu tradition and moved on and I have no guilt about it,” a teary Boodram said while informing the youths that they have a choice when it comes to violence in any form.
Giving her overview of the conference Boodram said that it was a great experience to see so many youths in attendance.
“The conference was very, very successful and was so packed we had to turn people away and we hated that,” she said.
“Actually to share our experiences with them to help them improve their lives I think is the end result we look forward to when we do these conferences,” she added.
She said that when participants walk away from the conference they might not react to the information at the same time but in future when faced with similar situations they will remember that they have an option.
“They will remember from the stories told here today, when faced with that emotion, that suicide is not an option, maybe inflicting pain on someone is not an option, maybe drinking is not an option and they will say I went to a conference once and I heard I have an option,” she said.
Meanwhile, Author and Director of the London Abused Woman Shelter, Megan Walker, said that she is pleased that the conference is dedicated to the life of a woman who is no longer here. She had a future ahead of her that was snuffed out because of domestic violence. She added that abused women are never forgotten.
She quoted President Donald Ramotar as saying, “It is a criminal and abhorrent act when any woman is abused emotionally, mentally or physically and no woman should be a victim of sexual or domestic violence.”
“I thought this is very important for two reasons because it is very unusual to have the political leaders to come out and call woman abuse a criminal act and secondly to have a political leader talk about it as woman abuse rather than domestic violence,” she said while commending the president for speaking out.
She said that while men are also victims of abuse those cases are rare or when they happen it is not reported. She added that while the home is supposed to be the safest place for women it is where they suffer abuse more, while stating that many women across the world are not treated equally because of their gender.
Upstanders
“I’m asking you to take action, to create peace in your homes, in your workplace and in your community…to create peace the first thing you got to do is to speak out, step out, create public awareness campaigns. We need you to use the arts, advocate for more shelters, advocate for male batterers programme so that men can learn that it is not cool to abuse women and girls and that real men treat women with respect,” Walker stated.
She urged the participants to become “upstanders” and not be “bystanders” and for them to take action and speak out to make a difference.
“There’s no shame in being a victim but there’s plenty of shame in being a man that abuses a woman,” she said while challenging the participants to stand up against violence.
Dance Alive Founder, Eric Phillips, said that the conference was a very important one. He added that there are too many young people dying and being abused in Guyana.
“When I came back to Guyana almost ten years ago I was struck by the destruction of our youths by the HIV/AIDS pandemic and I stayed and formed Dance Alive to deal with HIV,” he said.
“Illiteracy breeds violence”, he added, while stating that there is a need to educate the youths.
Also speaking at the conference was activist Ravi Dev who spoke about the difference between status and contract. He described status as being one family and contract which is bargaining and the addition of value to everything.
Participants at the conference were treated to heart rending performances underscoring the message of the theme. One such performance was that of the Jesus Deliverance International group.
In a beautifully choreographed dance to the song ‘How many more’ they dedicated their performance to the late Gopaul. At the end of their performance they presented Boodram and co-founder of CADVA Dianne Madray with a piece of cloth with hand prints representing the stamp out violence logo.
