Dancers with the Stars?

Dear Editor,

I read (SN, June 18) that the President said to the new members of the GPF that there are “too many complaints” and that there is the need to be “even-handed.”  This was after repeated denials from his inner circle that there is a serious and pervasive problem in that institution.  As if not to be outdone, the very charming (to himself) Attorney General said something at the asset forfeiture workshop (KN, June 20) to the effect that the Guyana government is committed to strengthening all the arms of the state relevant to money laundering.  Once again these pronouncements prove what it is that floats to the surface every time.

Given prevailing circumstances in Guyana, both men should be commended for their immeasurable love of bull.  And this is not talking about worship or meat-eating.  Readers can decide if this reference to bull means either the occasional runaway madness of Wall Street, or if it is part of a word (bullocks can be quickly eliminated).  Now, credit must be given where credit is due.  Thus, since these two men have done so well in their pontifications they are hereby recognized as the joint winners of the first ever Bull of the Week contest.

It quickly becomes clear, that these two leading lights of clearly suspect wattage somehow fancy themselves to be Dancers with the Stars.  The reality is that they step on toes.  Still, the two artists ought to be congratulated for demonstrating all the dexterity of (here we go again) bulldozers mired in mud, as they valiantly endeavour to cover the record and tracks with load after load of unadulterated, custom-made bull.  I appeal to the public to keep the thinking clean, but it is hard.

For unlike Spain’s ‘Running of the Bulls’ the Guyanese version is gastrointestinal and an uninterrupted year-long episode characterized by persuasive public evidence of loose lips, laryngeal stench, and verbal spills.  The fastidious will find all of this rather untidy, if not distasteful.  Now, while men should always be encouraged to be imaginative, too much bull can lead to mass revulsion, if not full scale retreat.  I should say that this speaks for itself.

In the meantime, the winners can collect their prizes at the Parade Ground; these are the prodigious volumes of previous public deliveries of the same fare by the same characters, and so welcomed by farmers for their fertilizing richness. This is part of the price of progress.

Yours faithfully,
GHK Lall