Since I moved to Europe, things have been a bit hectic and sometimes a bit unbalanced because of the nature of my husband’s job. We did slow down last weekend for a city break to meet up with friends in Paris, thank God!
I think Paris is a bucket list destination for most girls or should I say most girly girls. The city has such a charming, infectious culture bolstered by its fashion, architecture, food and lifestyle in general; it’s really hard to be dismissive of it when anyone asks you to join them for a trip. However, I also believe there is some amount of overrated hype about Paris. You know, the concept that love can always be found in the subway station and that every inch of the place is coated with layers of style. It is beautiful, don’t get me wrong. But it’s definitely not as totally perfect as some people make it out to be. The subway stations actually smell like urine and are probably some of the dirtiest I have ever come across.
Prior to the week of my travelling, I told my husband I wanted everything to be new for my first trip to Paris. I had this intense feeling of not being good enough to go there just as I was. For the city that trademarked so much style and grace for decades, I felt as if I had to reinvent myself just a little.
Travelling has turned into such a thing and we value what we look like in our vacation photographs. So I started to research new hair care products. I bought two and then I proceeded to face care and beauty tools. I invested in a new eco-line of make-up brushes, a new primer and I even decided to try out Bobbi Brown’s foundation. People who know me well, know that I am basically the biggest Black Opal cosmetics fan. For me to buy a whole new type of foundation extends itself to how much Paris had become a fantasy.
I was investing so much in my image that it got to the point where my husband told me that nothing magical will happen when we see the Eiffel Tower. I naturally got upset at him and carried on with my perfection mission. He didn’t understand the perfection anxiety that Paris had wrought, contracted mostly on Instagram. It makes you so desperate to visit the place.
I ordered most of the things online and decided to leave my clothes for the last minute as I wanted to buy them in brick and mortar stores. I missed my first package delivery and I had to re-schedule it and spent those two days sitting around waiting. I then ran out of time as the package only came three hours before I had to leave. I had no time to run to the city to go shopping. All my plans of creating the perfect look were diminished. I had to resort to my wardrobe and try to pull pieces together.
I absolutely hate doing this when I have big plans to consume fashion. I always feel as if my outfit could never be perfect enough. I keep getting these flashes of “If I had” things would be so much better. I managed to put together two pieces, very city like and very easy for trekking across the City of Love.
What dawned on me when I was in Paris, was the false ‘happiness’ we buy into from the internet. We equate real happiness to being in certain places, having certain things or looking a certain way. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t think it’s wrong to treat yourself or to spend your time getting dolled up, but doing all that in anticipation of creating the perfect moment, can cause you to lose the moment whilst you are trying too hard to create and project it.
At times we look at other people’s holiday photos and how perfect they are to the point where we become frustrated with our own realities. This can cause us, in some cases, to even create unnecessary unhappiness about our own realities, which in fact may not be that bad. This has grown to become such a trend that often we don’t even realize we’re doing it until we take a step back and learn to disconnect. Let’s admit it, we have become so driven to be admired that no one wants to be the one with just a few likes on Facebook or Instagram; so we spend a considerate amount of time plotting how to be perfect and beautiful for the world to see.
In the end I didn’t have to create such a fuss over something that is incomparable to the actual moment of being in the City of Love with my love. I’m glad I missed my scheduled delivery and that my spoilt ways were pounced on. I felt happier as we drove back; I saved some money and I learned more about living in the moment.
If you are going on a city or island break anytime soon, try to organize your clothing according to your itinerary instead of fanaticizing about crafting the “perfect vacay picture”.
