A mark of shame

Pick a day. Any day. And then check the global statistics; you will find that more than 100 women were murdered by their husbands, partners or family members. According to a report from the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC), for 2017, 50,005 women were killed by partners or family members, a rate of 137 per day and an increase from the last reported statistics in 2012 when the number stood at 48,000 equal to some 131 per day.

While the figures might be higher in some places, there is no country on earth where women escape being murdered, raped, beaten or otherwise abused in their homes or by their partners or former partners. UN Secretary-General António Guterres has referred to this state of affairs as a mark of shame on society. He also quite rightly posited: “Not until the half of our population, represented by women and girls, can live free from fear, violence and everyday insecurity, can we truly say we live in a fair and equal world.” There can be no gender equality as long as women and girls continue to experience intimate partner and sexual violence, harassment and other forms of abuse, or are forced into marriage or trafficked by the unscrupulous among us, some of whom are also women.

On Sunday last, November 25, designated by the UN as the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women, the observance of 16 days of activism to this cause began. It officially ends on December 10, which is also Human Rights Day. But really and truly, activism to eliminate violence against women should only end when its purpose has been served. Sixteen days to rail against what is in effect human rights violations often committed with impunity might seem like a lot but they are not nearly enough. Vigorous action to bring about a change in this scourge on humanity is needed every single day.

According to statistics from the UNODC, annually, more men and boys are murdered than women and girls. Figures published in 2014, reveal that for 2013, of the 436,621 murders reported globally, 343,582 were men. But here’s the kicker: more than half of the women murdered were killed by their husbands, boyfriends, fathers or brothers. Meanwhile, the majority of men, 82 percent, were murdered by strangers.

There is no gainsaying the shameful fact that women are murdered simply because they are women. It is truly a mark of shame that we live in a society where some men regard women as their property to do with as they will. Such men, therefore, see nothing wrong with psychologically, emotionally or physically abusing the women in their lives if they express an opinion, prepare a certain meal, or show any form of independence, among other things. Such men will murder their wives/girlfriends if they leave them or attempt to. Such men will rape their wives, girlfriends, dates or strangers because they believe they have a right. They have cast out, publicly embarrassed or killed their daughters or sisters if they date or fall in love with anyone who does not meet their approval for religious, financial or other reasons. All of these acts and many others committed against women and girls daily are in grave violation of their rights as human beings. Yet for years, stigma, discrimination and negative stereotypes saw an emboldening of these heinous actions, hidden as they were behind a wall of secrecy.

Some women have found that speaking out and approaching the authorities for redress served to halt the cowardly hands raised against them. But this is not always the case as too few abusers are capable of being shamed into stopping, if only temporary at times, their pattern of behaviour. A local case in point was revealed in an interview published on Sunday last, wherein a 19-year-old trainee nurse and child rights advocate related the horror of years of physical, psychological and emotional abuse at the hands of her father, who also abused her mother and later trained her older brother to perpetuate the same acts. Her utter despair led to her attempting suicide two years ago and subsequently speaking out about the abuse she endured, which saw an end to the physical side of it. However, sadly, she has not and may never receive justice for the crimes committed against her.

In other places around the world, the #metoo and #timesup movements in which women speak candidly about being sexually and physically abused or sexually harassed have seen men brought to justice and ostracised. But there is still much more to be done to end this global scourge. During the next 11 days, the majority of the activists will be women, many among them — 1 in every 3 — would have experienced/will experience physical or sexual violence in their lifetime most frequently by an intimate partner. There is space for more men in the ranks and those who are right-thinking and abhor the status quo must do all they can to shine a light among their peers.