Dear Editor,
I read in the papers of the 14-year-old girl who thrashed the man who pounced on her while on her way to school, apparently with intent to rape or molest her in whatever way. He didn’t know she had the skills to evade the attack due to her training as a female amateur boxer. I would like to congratulate her and her parents for being so thoughtful as to allow her to pursue a career in boxing because everything that happens in one’s life has a purpose. I do hope the law deals with the attacker seeing that she was skilful enough to remove the jersey from his face. This should let parents know that they can never be at their children’s side every passing moment and they have a duty to teach their children to be responsible and to take care of themselves. As part of the human right to life people should learn self-defence mechanisms. Every other living creature on this earth great or small has a self-defence mechanism. Why is it the human being doesn’t see it fit that females, especially, should have proper self-defence mechanisms? Is this part of the oppressive tactics that give room to domestic violence?
If you go back in history, men and women had the balance of power; they fought on the battlefield together; they ruled politically and economically; they learnt all the self-defence skills together until patriarchal laws started debarring women from these activities under the pretext of being ‘proper women.’
I think that all women‘s organizations and Parent Teacher Associations should take note and start advising women to take time to learn self defence, whether it’s karate, kick boxing, judo, boxing or something else. Moreover, let the saying “you’re never too old to learn” become a mantra. Stop emphasising that we have to please our men.
I think we spend too much time emphasizing sexual satisfaction than protecting ourselves from the violence that is dealt out to women.
Many women who are qualified and handling their own paychecks are victims of domestic violence. How much longer must women just think about pleasing their menfolk? Women have been pleasing them from the time we gave them the precious gift of life at birth and many of us women, who are mothers, have spoilt our sons to be so selfish and self-centred that they have become perverted and sadistic.
Some unfortunately teach their sons to ‘honour me alone, your mother, and all other women are to be used, misused and abused.’ Some mothers say to other women: “I loose my bull, you have to pen your heifer.” These sons become fathers and say to their sons: “You have to follow in my footstep and be a village ram. Women are there for your picking and if they don’t give in, you got to beat them to subdue them. Let them know you are the man in charge.”
Some parents even encourage their sons to beat their sisters, so the men have learnt to subdue women or to violate them using violence. Sons who are brought up this way by their mothers go around looking for a mother in their women; one who can encourage them in their weaknesses.
Mothers need to teach their sons to protect women. Parents, especially mothers, are the first teachers and children learn what they live.
We celebrated Mothers’ Day earlier this month; this one day is to reinforce the values of motherhood, but Mothers’ Day is every day. Women are the true life-givers, thus women are very important. Let’s stop the violence towards women.
Yours faithfully,
Juliana Hughes
